“Repeating conditioned ways of behaving

Grows a constant branch of stagnancy

Opening new pathways of seeing

drives awareness into the center of harmony Sprouting new ritual with every unfolding

There’s a drum inside the center of your chest

and it’s beating rhythmically

Every beat sends us forward into awakening

You are the product of the day dreams

of all of your ancestry

And it’s your responsibility

To change patterns of destructive energy

By loving who You are unconditionally.” -LB

“Oh my love,

There are no movements

No vocabulary

That reflect the heart

Of this deep love.

There is only transparency

And unending desire

To meet you

Again and again In this space.” -LB

“The bird

She lives inside of me

My body is a fountain

Over - flowing

Transformation and honesty

A sign that the nature of truth Is transitory

And to stay in authentic expression

We must keep unfolding

I am not my name

But my name is of me

She sings a song In the direction of remembering

And even though I constantly fall into the forgetting

She calls me back

Again and again With her melody “- LB

“There’s an intersection

Between heart and identity

Pulled by the current of awakening

I’m gathered to the points of tension within me

A place to be seated

Steady In the energy

Of who I think I am

And what I want

Creates swirling whirlpools around me

Constantly moving

Lost in the turning

I loose connection with the role I was playing Where am I? What was my intention?

And if I can’t remember

Is it worth living?

I pull over and over

On the thread of limited thinking

Until it draws the moon down to me

I swallow her up whole

So the reflection of loving awareness

Can illuminate Inside me.” -LB

“What can I say

That wouldn’t be a story?

Only a partial version of reality.

Practice Un-ties

Everything I’ve wrapped myself Up to be.

Un- binds

Everything I put into hiding.

And all that’s left to face

Is this honesty: Love doesn’t look like

How we sketched it out to be

And the confines of perfection

Are not all their cracked up to be

And it’s just....that sometimes

I’d rather be floating in the sky

Or perched in a tree

Then rooted on the ground

And listening to the chattering

Everyone is trying to say something...

All that’s left for me to say is I’m sorry.

Perhaps if I’d known from the beginning

It would have turned out differently.

Or as they say,

Everything is already as it should be.” -LB

“The space that love creates

When we trust the form

Infinity takes

One Now at a time

Great Spirit has a way

Of shifting experience

Endlessly

So that we are always living

The highest expression of love” - LB

“What is left to say?

When my body bled

All there is to bleed.

And my lungs have said

All there is to be screamed on the matter.

I am left with this silence,

A catch in my throat.

When I try to explain

Who I am at the moment.

No one really takes the time,

To see past the lips

And listen to the eyes.

There is access to the great void inside

But most often we prefer

The comfort of little white lies.

What we hear

And what is being said

Are two different story lines.

What we see

And what is really meant

Are often lost in the conversation.

My heart, she’s the real dancer.

My body is just the cosmic illusion.

Something to distract for the moment,

While my truth sneaks out the back door....” -LB​

“This is tender.

The constant unfolding of body

And the way she shifts and changes.

Sometimes it’s unnerving,

The way I dream I have control

But never really do.

Ownership is an illusion.

I’ve never really had her,

She’s on loan.

And as much as I may try

To impose my will

She has karma all her own.

There are times I see her brilliance,

And there are times her beauty hides

It’s only moments I forget her

And then pray hard to find

Myself satisfied.

Practice is the reminder,

I am only at rest in the surrender.

In the total release

Of my grip in the now.

The acceptance of the fluctuations of structure,

Has me In love

With all the particulars of being born.

Body presents itself.

Unveiled,

Magic mirrors

Reflecting back eternal mantras of Self Love.” -LB

“ I’ve seen myself from both sides

Of the Looking Glass.

And I gazed so hard I realized,

That there were more than two dimensions. And what I had been judging so hard

Was merely just scratching the surface.

There are layers of identity

That run through in multiple directions.

And I’ve been tapping on the door of Kundalini Hoping she’ll dispel all of my attachments.

I keep reaching for the keyhole of understanding,

And MA shows me the way in.

The tragedy isn’t that were born into form

But that were conditioned to believe it.

This body,

She can’t be liberated.

But that’s not who I was to begin with....” -LB

Sensation, is your grand gift of being human. A human being in full presence of life experience, embraces all fluctuations of living. This is the expression “the yogi runs towards suffering.” Remember, pleasure is suffering too. The yogi runs towards feeling in its fullest. It’s a practice to not deny your fear, to fully embrace pain, to be completely present during joy and remember all of it is temporary. Do not try to grip and withstand what life moves through you. Be like the water and let it flow through, unattached. Staying present regardless of the intensity of experience is a doorway to liberation.

“What is lost In the absence of identity?

The uncoiling of understanding

Undoes my ties.

Now exposed,

It’s apparent, the vigilance

Of gathering in a sense of self

From everything.

Grasping at definition I find,

There’s actually nothing.

And this vacancy stills my hurry.

The loss of who I think I am

Opens me A little wider every time.

Until I am the void,

Consciousness alive.

Without the need to identify

Seen only by the grace of light.

My whole being pulsates

Madly in love with the divine.” -LB

Feeling into such deep gratitude for this gift of life. Appreciation, reverence,honoring for this physical form. Remembering, I am not the body but body is dear sweet friend and vessel. Salutations to the many forms you take in this one lifetime. The constant mirror of impermanence that keeps me awake to the profound beauty that is everyone and everything.-LB

"Silence speaks nothing

And says everything

Stillness does nothing

And moves mountains Inside of me

I've been doing

Moving rapidly

Praying for the opening

But it's the sweet kiss of softening

That heightens the prayer within me

I've been called fire

And have the tendency towards burning The quiet

She's my recipe

To see wholeness Lit up" -LB

"Is it possible to give too much?

In the height of the prayer

All of me rises to the surface

And for a few moments,

Freedom is in the offering.

Heavy in the witness,

My most inner workings spill out on the floor

I try to gather them back in

To hold

But it's slippery,

Sliding through my fingers

Seeping into the floorboards.

Tell me,

How long before the whole truth shows?

I see something

Pointing in the direction of reality,

But it's constantly shifting

Moving

Or maybe I've been chasing

The center of stillness all along." -LB​

"Hold me now

When I feel my arms have emptied

All their understanding

And I do not know

How this love shows

And then hides away

Somewhere in the darkened hallways of my mind I've wondered if I'm good enough?

Worthy of your love?

 In the spirit of remembering

I find myself somersaulting

Hurried to your call

And then I feel the breath of bird's wings

They mother me

In the still

And the quiet

I am held." -LB​

"What will they think?

When they see I've untied

The stones from my feet. Unbound,

By any need for hiding

I leave my ropes,

Trailing.

Where once imaginary lines

Held me captive

I dance in circles now

Twirling to the sound of nothing.

Words have a power

To hold us down If we believe them.

Who says solid bone wasn't made for flying?

I am a bird

Without the hallow tubing.

Awake,

I can feel it as I'm walking.

I'm hovering 3 inches off the ground

You may call it astounding,

But it's an untethered mind

That has no use for gravity.

In the absence of waiting,

At rest in the pause of the unknown

I accept,

No part of this was ever mine to own.

Wrapped loosely in the freedom I'm in,

I'll keep my organs for now,

Underneath my skin." -LB

"Dream whispers come in fuzzy

 The sound waves clipping in and out When I think I'm speaking nice

It's funny

The tone that actually comes out

Or there was never any sound

Vocal capability lost

Between here and the other realm

It sounds brilliant at bed time

But in the light of morning

The death of the ego comes

Screaming the love song

Of everlasting rebirth

And it seems

I've missed my window once again Opportunity lost

To gather awareness in

There it goes.....

Awareness chasing pleasure down again Another night of sleep lost

To my human restlessness." -LB​

"Consider this my offering.

The full expression of self.

All I have inside

Laid out now,

At the feet of the divine

To devour when she wants.

This one-ness is all consuming

And I am blissful

To drown in the ocean

Of the Mother's love.

The waves of awareness

Wash over me

And I surrender

 To this prayer

This song"-LB​

"I am not a warning

I am the skin of humanity

This that I was born into

Blood, flesh skin and bone.

I am not a figure to be masked

Covered

For all the things that I should be shameful

Guilty for.

This is a sacred form

And it should be seen

A clothed thread to unravel

Realness to be shown

Rawness to be known.

I am woman

I am man

I am the earth

Fire, water, wind.

I am the spark of discomfort

And the home of unconditional love.

I am mirroring

Everything that you want to see

Temporarily.

Illusion provides a gentle screen

Soft filter for our processing.

And then when we are ready to remember

All that we've been

Everything comes off

Revealing the face of truth,

authenticity." -LB

"Remembering

This ancient wisdom

Gathers in a dreamy recollection

Of somewhere I have already been Now shows

As something that I am

Temporary embodiment

I gather in

Stories that tie me back

Taught Like spiderwebs

Displaying an intricate design

Of all that's been

This is just a sketch

A brilliant rough draft

We start over again" -LB​

" Hear comes the wind.

That whispers Inside.

'Run faster' she said

This time for your life.

The places where

The tread of my shoes have worn down

Reveal for me.

I see it all laid out

Like a timeline of guilty.

Except now there is no running,

No exit for leaving.

And I'm stuck here in my skin

Craving the numbness

The space with no feeling.

Just give me ample room

For moving

And tell me just exactly how

To stop all the measuring.

From the outside looking in,

it sometimes looks like suffering.

But if you wonder why I chose it,

It's liberation

Not comfort I'm seeking.

Can't you feel the pace?

It's quickening.

And at the end of this storm

The wind is going to still me." -LB

"Fear of expansion

Kept me held in

When the fullness of me Is ready, heavy at the brim

Weighted

Waiting

To pour over

Spill out

To draw in

Our nature is to grow

Our nuture is to lift

Up

And yet we never mention

That wings have density

And the ability of flight comes from having a body." - LB​

"The mother calls

And her voice echoes

In every different sound

The deepest wells

Come from the spaces

That are the most challenging to love Beckon your inner eyes

Not to turn away

Sing your heart

Awake

To the dissonance

And the resonance

Of every place

This access to the

One pointedness of love" -LB

“I can’t offer you an explanation

For my intensity

I can only say, It’s in me.

I can’t tell you why I burn so fiercely I can only say,

The fire is in me.

This love for the Supreme

Breaking down all the blocked pathways in me

Feel like I’ve been loosing my mind chasing down the TRUTH

With a capital T

Wanting so desperately

to find a way OUT

But the way through,

Is in me.

The TRUTH is

What’s happening

And I can’t pin point

Why I react this way

I can only say,

It’s a force in me

And it’s about to

Tear all my understanding apart.”

-LB .

Music: RY X - Yayaya

“Courage

Is the only requirement

For practice

A raging fire In the heart

If you feed it

It will pull you beyond

Your own inner boundaries

This walk Is not for the fearful You have to want the truth

More than you are afraid of it.” -LB

Something that has been on my mind the past couple days about trauma and healing....and I can’t help but wonder if we are thinking to one dimensional about trauma? There is all this verbal drive to “heal” your trauma. Which for me, right away I hear “something is wrong, you should fix it.” My experience with trauma, especially trauma of the body, is that it ends up being a vortex of wisdom. If I’m willing to recognize and sit with the impact of these traumas as they come up I’m learning tremendous amounts from them. Listening to them, playing with them, moving them through my body, they give me access to my emotional body. (Which I’ve struggled to access) If I play into the paradigm that they need healing or fixing, it’s seems I emotionally by-pass them. What I’m exploring right now, so that I keep provoking my emotional body and be ok with feeling is...

1. nothing is wrong with anything that has happened through me. (Nothing really ever happens to me)

2.because nothing is wrong with my experience, I do not have to be ashamed of it or look for a way to change it, fix it or hide it.

3.being transparent about the details. Much like you may have seen in my insta story during my colonoscopy prep.

4. Let it rise. (Still learning how to do this) If it’s coming up, it’s coming out. And what comes out of me (or anyone else for that matter) is prayer in motion.

5. There is never anything to fear. - words from the great teacher Stoma. They have come back for me again and again. Everything I experience is me. So if I’m not afraid of myself I can fully love who I am.

Music: Suebee Fae - Faith’s Hymn

“Feel THIS And Remember:

    This

        is

          MA in motion....”

- LB

Music: SYML - Fear of the Water

*Loving Reminders*

Offer it all up.

Let it flow through

And attune you.

Show your light.

Show your dark.

Recognize they are the same, And break through Into total ecstasy. -LB